That feels like a feather sliding on a piece of paper. The image on the desktop, peeking at me from behind this window, makes me want to peek back at it.

A funny message thread, on Instagram, with Alex, via some jokes she sends me on how people text nowadays (or don’t) and are with one another, at the beginning of relationships, gets us rolling, laughing, same. And at the ending of relationships, simultaneously, I’m suggesting. It’s inside joking, but it’s also cosmic truth. I, on another planet, am completely in my zone, no connection whatsoever to the aforementioned kind of thing going on in the dating world, it’s a choice I proudly made, it’s who I am. It’s out of this world communication that gives me energy, it’s something else that I prefer simultaneously, and always tchin-tchin with Alex to. Birds of a feather flock together, after all.

I’ve learned my lessons, alright, and who now knows exactly what who now wants in life? Precisely.

Why do I find this so funny? Is it because it’s true? I’m babe, btw.

So, this is what I send her back, we laugh, our ahahahas come in, and we start a convo on Instagram. Each media with its own topic of the moment, what to do. Not bad, as my brother says. My brother’s daughters initiated this piece of paper, to begin with. Our latest iMessages thread, in our group of 3, hilarious, ended up with bruh. Post You’re SO cheesy. Post a pink heart sent with echo. I kinda became accustomed to Natasha’s bruh, it’s been going on for a while. Of course it didn’t stray me away from my stars, hearts, rockets, fireworks and all the good stuff. My stars, hearts, rockets, fireworks and all the good stuff didn’t stray her away from her eew, either. On the outside. Because, on the inside, I bet she’s (always) grinning.

Babe thingy is best

It’s what connected us first

Aw, did what just rhyme? 

Or it’s this rhythm thingy that’s rhyming and we’re just driving?

If an Aries loves you, they will bully you into loving yourself. If pouring delicious energy into someone is called bulling, then all of you bullies out there and in disguise, you’ve been doing it all wrong, newsflash. Natasha is, also, an Aries. She might seem tough and all, but we both know she’s also soft, I completely get that and she knowns that I do, so she can’t hide, maybe she enjoys not having to, it’s a process, and it’s beautiful. Anywaze, waze, road tripping, playlist. I got you, babe.

Aries: When I talk, I’m rude. When I don’t talk, I gotta attitude. Leave me tf alone. It’s comic, come on, close to cosmic. Or Aries: Literally nobody helps me with anything. Also Aries: Oh my god, you’re doing it all wrong, just give it to me. Funny Aries, funny.

Being around grownups does that to one. What? Makes one forget. Eew, yeah, yeah. Her sister Inga and I, we’re here to remind her, at all times, that it’s about the sparkle. At all times. Lots of babes sent by guess who, throughout our thread, makes me have a blast. I can’t stop. Don’t want to. Uh-oh, Inga’s bruh comes in, for the first time. Oh no. My eyes are rolling as I’m laughing, kids energy. You don’t know what the last time we hugged goodbye was like, but you can imagine it when it’s in the movies that you see it. Dreamlike. Our love in real life, so babe, bruh. It’s alright, it’s cosmic energy, someone has to be responsible in here.

Because when you meet me, you think I’m quiet, when you talk to me, you wish I was quiet, when you know me, you’ll be scared when I’m quiet. Funny, funny. 

Others: if it’s love, they will come back. Aries: if it’s love, they will never leave. Ooh.

You know how a picture pops up in explore, on your Instagram, and swoosh, without you even realising (but realeyesing), a door to a whole new thing opens up, you’re exploring alright, you take a screenshot, you save it. Especially when it’s a thing that makes you smile, a thing that you, obviously, take seriously. 

Aries: Can you multitask? Yes, actually, I am losing my mind and chilling at the same time. I mean… 

It just makes you feel good. Of course it does, it’s cosmically shared. It’s the s*it. Just as it is when I’m texting Alex, Alex is texting me, and we’re smiling at our phones. Flowers. A beach. A glass of margarita. Air. Expansion. Hair in the air. Hands. Stare. A bubbly conversation. A whole day of watching great movies in bed. Delicious thingies in pajamas. In your bathrobes, in the kitchen, wherever. It’s fascinating how a true laugh has so much power to bring in peace. Just as anything that is true has.

These signs are actively reading the room at all times. They’ll pick up on moods, emotions and energies. Nothing gets past them. Confirmed.

Living your truth keeps you out of the loop that just doesn’t feel true. You can’t always expect the truth from others, but you can expect it from yourself. It’s the kind of discussion I might have with my brother, or Alex, on a casual Friday night, over facetime. We’re here for life. We’re home. We can all agree on what true home feels like. Or style. It’s that extra something. There’s a style to dating, too. Dating sounds special when it’s got that extra something. You just gotta know your style. Or burn down your very best yesterday every day, so you can start again, as Kristen, in the Chanel ad, would say. Or as Kristen, at the Berlinale 2023, would anything. Or listen to Chaka Khan’s I’m Every Woman. Watch Whitney’s cover of it, too. Music takes you home and life is, continuously, rolling in the deep. Red roe, on a good baguette toast and butter takes me home, we’ve known each other since I was born. Some insanely mouthwatering new fruit that flashes the cas (as in casual) takes me to another planet. Same. You’re in for the good stuff you bet you can’t get enough of. And you dance, this is it. Gracefully surrendering. Style has this allure, too. You have to give in, from time to time. Or. Or. Every day. You know what feels like the s*it. Absolute pleasure. That’s the thing. 

A particular song has been crossing my mind every once in a while. I don’t know what song it is, yet. While looking for it, I stumbled upon another one, forgot all about it, and here we are. Now, I have to find it. Probably play on repeat and come back, but let’s see. Oh man. It’s Madonna’s, that I am almost sure of, and I remember listening to this song on repeat, a long time ago, and I just might delete all this when I find it. I’m kidding, I’m kidding. Or am I? The teeth chattering emoji is being silly, somewhere in the ether. It’s something with give in… I keep on bumping into Give It 2 Me, which I, also, developed an obsession with, as soon as it was released, but it’s not this song the particular song that I’m talking about. The particular song that I can hear in the back of my mind, but can’t put a finger on. Maybe I should give in to give it 2 me. Welcome to my world! 

Chaka Khan’s Like Sugar was playing before typing in Madonna. Ooh, it’s so good. It’s like sugar. So sweet. Good enough to eat. I, of course, am texting it to my brother, to Alex. 

Rain is here and this is gonna take a while. Perfect timing for headphones. Your love’s coming down like… Something that sounds like cool driving, or some kind of taking off in the rain, and drums, and everything elevating… Here comes the sun.

The word surrender has been coming up, pretty often, lately. It’s when the cosmos intervenes, I guess.

Like A Prayer has been popping up, pretty often, lately, too. Thought I could skip it, but nope. It feels intimate through the headphones straight into your head. It’s straight into your heart when it’s coming through the speakers, at home, and your arms are up. You close your eyes. Smile. Sing. Just like a prayer, no choice, your voice can take me there. Something with give in is playing in the back of it all. Oh man. Of course, I’m listening to it until the end.

Cherish!

!!!!!!!

I Want You is here, so I am losing my mind and chilling at the same time. It’s an album I used to fall asleep to, when I was eleven. I’ll Remember just started. I’m on the floor and every bone in my body is thanking me. Delightful. Devoted. Charming, ha!

Take A Bow. It’s the chills that get through my spine, as soon as I hear it beginning. I skip it, though, I’m on a mission here.

Ooh, You’ll See. That beginning, too. Skipping it, however. Mission.

Pff Crazy For You.

So, it’s not on this album, either. 

Justify My Love began to play, it’s one of my all time favourite songs, so. So, now what? I know this will all make sparkling sense, buckle up. The vibe of the song that I’m looking for is similar, I can feel it.

Hm, Beautiful Stranger. 

It’s like a snowball, but it’s not cold. It’s warm, it’s a sunball that’s been rolling, and rolling, and rolling, so deep that it came to me! It’s Michael’s Give In To Me. Only queens and kings in here, that’s right. I typed in the title, am filling up my lungs and pressing play. Yup, it’s this emotion, this chorus that has been the soundtrack of this piece of paper. Give in to the feeling, that’s it, pfew. 

Back to Like Sugar, oh yeah! When you know exactly what you want in life, you’re able to take quick and necessary changes to produce the results you’re after. Speed of sound, speed of light, cosmic, cosmic. The amount of discipline that it takes is invaluable, rich, it takes you to the undeniable truth that makes you feel sexy, unique, and no one can take that away from you.

Aries: My standards are high, because I can provide what I require. Read that again. Or you know, put that on your plate, as Midge and Susie put it best. Or Once I care, I don’t leave. Once I leave, I don’t care. We may have big hearts, but once you f us over, we’re gone. These are not just facts about Aries, are they? It’s basic human what? Human nature.

Something that sounds like very cool driving, or some kind of taking off, in the rain, and drums, and everything elevating. You feel it flowing through your veins, it’s easy, there’s nothing else you can do about it, anyway, when it doesn’t let you sleep. When you wake up, listen to the birds singing, in the trees you see from every window, on 5:55 a.m., you smile uncontrollably, you don’t really think about the not really sleeping, and you let the feather slide on paper. Noticing something you cannot see is the Faith George Michael is singing about. It’s light and you like to keep it light, you like it deep, too, you like it when it feels like the s*it. Flowers, Cristina, flowers. I love the light, but man, the stars shine so bright tonight. Shh.

I don’t flirt, I just talk. It’s not my fault everything I say is smoother than the cream cheese spread on your bagel.